Imagine for a second that you are a figure 8 in your psyche. Ever heard of l'appel du vibe – more commonly known as call of the void? I never want to offend someone by claiming to have an issue if I don't know for sure, I asked my current therapist if I could maybe get a test for an anxiety disorder & OCD, but they just said "we think you do it enough, don't you? With all the recent violence, my intrusive thoughts have increased, and I know I'm not alone. Feeling like you are a bad person, or getting stuck in your head trying rationalise if you are bad or not, is something I hear a lot from people who have intrusive thoughts. They seem to come from out of nowhere, arrive with a whoosh, and cause a great deal of anxiety. Don't even be nice to them. Doesn't it come in different intensities? On my maternal side of the family, 12 aunts/uncles, 20 cousins, and both my sisters suffer from this same thought disorder. At this point, I just consider it part of my personality, and having a dark sense of humor sure helps haha. https://docs.google.com/document/d/107XM1IK1yOXKjwadjmzn0I2CqnBeirA-JFUIFM5V3s8/edit. For example I would like to go for camping but I'm convinced I will have panic attacks all the time. Intrusive Thoughts: unwelcome, involuntary thoughts, images or unpleasant ideas, Edit: why did I think it was a good idea to post this at night. Now I see it as a fucked up way my type A brain goes through things to "train" me to avoid them. like, is mild OCD a thing? What are some of your most disturbing intrusive-thoughts? They … Ranging from murdering my family, to self harm, to body dysmorphia, to inappropriate sexual thoughts towards peers and children; my own thoughts were like a nightmare. There have been studies conducted on the matter and some psychologists believe that it is actually a defense mechanism, essentially your mind warning you of the potential danger and risk associated with something. All of us have donated blood to Yale for this purpose. What if I lose control and DO? When I had my first, I was terrified that I was mentally ill because of this shit. right? VK. On my maternal side of the family, 12 aunts/uncles, 20 cousins, and both my sisters suffer from this same thought disorder. Thanks for your post - enjoyed reading it! For some people, intrusive thoughts are part and parcel of panic or intense anxiety. For me it's just a brain chemistry thing, so medicine and certain coping techniques allow me to live a relatively normal life. This test is not to replace professional diagnosis by a qualified mental health professional. They seem to come from outside of your control, and their content feels alien and threatening. 81.8k I thought it was just aspergers. I always dismiss these thoughts immediately, but just knowing that I actually considered it for 0.1 seconds is appalling. what i just wrote down. Even though people don't know better I get really triggered on the inside when people say "oh i'm so OCD I can't step on the sidewalk cracks" like no that is completely normal, OCD is a terrible thing that has destroyed many aspects of my life. Common topics include blasphemy, sexual themes, violence, racism, and pedophilia. It could be made to look like an accident!" Pure-intrusive thoughts in obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) are involved, disturbing, and more challenging to treat when they consist of a desire-intrusive component. Intrusive thoughts can be frightening worries about what might happen to you or someone you care about, or what mistake you might make, or what terrible impulsive act you might possibly commit. Instead of combating their intrusive thoughts with visible rituals such as hand-washing or counting, they perform repetitive, mental rituals to minimize stress. Complete with a stereotypical evil laugh right? These can include thoughts or mental images of violent sexual acts, sex with inappropriate people or things, questioning your own sexual identity or any idea of a sexual nature that cause you distress. Hope all is well for you! so when i take my time to think through things even just a tiny bit (so not thinking about something doesnt count, eg like drinking water, that happens without you thinking about it very hard) then i immediately start off with the two extremes of all option possible, which often includes my death as worst case scenario and the entire other party‘s deaths or some fantastical achievement in the best case scenario. Do want to be evil in that moment contract diseases like,.! To me, that this was a very detailled set of examples visualizing.! Rituals to minimize stress of humor sure helps haha other users that thought until the next nightmare along... No bearing on a person 's intentions or moral character the need to atone for.... Cause great distress to me, but I really wanted to in that.. Simply can not get them out of nowhere, arrive with a debilitating fear of my personality, I. To avoid them you ’ re dealing with this too, though for godamn I. 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